Wednesday I had a bout with the Fraud Police. I got an offer to do a speaking gig that I’m THRILLED about for an organization I ADORE. I was asked to submit some materials for the selection committee, no problem.
Then I got panicky. What if they don’t like me? Did I screw up that call? Am I doing this right? What if I don’t even get picked. OOoooooooohhhhhh…..suddenly I wanted to crawl under the covers.
Then I felt compelled to WORKHARDRIGHTNOW!!!! Do more, faster. And get on that right away. I’d better fix all the problems right now and prove that I’m good enough. I could barely think, I got so anxious.
WTHeck?!? I was beyond excited a few minutes ago, I was jumping up and down (yes, literally) and now I’m pushing myself to workhardworkhardworkhard? Fishy….then I realized I just got hit by the Fraud Police, saying “who do you think you are?, you’re not enough to work with someone that great.”.
And I bought it for a bit, a few rough hours until I realized that’s all kinds of BS. I’d be perfect for this organization and their request is well within my skills. I’m already enough, whether they choose me or not.
Once I got there, I was able to start creating content, what would I say to these folks, what would make a difference for them, how could I really move these people? I was able to get to work, easily, without pressure and knowing I am way more than enough. Whew.
This is the value of doing the work on a regular basis. So when you get into a funk, you can pull yourself out quickly, with minimal damage or wasted time. I reached out to a friend, but she wasn’t available. I was stuck spinning on my own for a bit, but was able to sort it out because I have learned to manage myself well. In the past that spin out would have lasted days and I probably would have messed up the materials or backed out of the whole thing. This time, I saw the panic, was able to ID the issue, got my insight, and got back on the wagon moving forward. Once again, Whew to the highest order. And hooray!, can’t wait to see if this speaking opportunity comes through.